life's little moments teach us a lot and if we are not attentive enough we miss out. Awareness is the first step towards appreciation of the abundance that graces nature. What stunning lessons ....
At coffee break this morning I saw Amal at the coffee shop helping herself to several pieces of sandwich and kossum bread ( a kind of soft bread like croissants)…. a plateful of them. As I complimented her for her voracious appetite, Jerry, our coffee room in-charge started laughing. He said Amal was his best customer. She took almost half of all the stuff he had for sale, he said.
Amal offered me a piece of meat filled sandwich knowing very well that I was a vegetarian and wouldn’t eat it. She is very clever. When I said “No, thank you”, as I have done in the past, she asked me “Mr. Raman, why don’t you eat meat?”
I said, “Who said that I didn’t? I do eat meat.”
“Then why don’t you accept this sandwich”, Amal asked.
“Oh! I don’t eat this kind.” I replied.
“What kind do you eat?”
I said “Well, I eat the meat from plants.”
“What plants?”
“You know, plants like spinach, lettuce, tomato, potato, carrot, orange, apple. There are plenty to feed me”
“Oh! Mr. Raman, come on. These are vegetables and fruits. You can’t call them meat.”
“What is meat?” I questioned.
“Meat is the flesh of animals like cow and sheep, camel and rabbit”, Amal responded.
“That is animal meat. What I mentioned are plant meats.”
“So if you can eat plant meat why can’t you eat animal meat?”
I asked her, “Please permit me to ask you a difficult question. This is not to offend you but to just make a point of discussion.”
“Go ahead”, she said.
“Tell me, if you can eat animal meat, why can’t you eat human meat?”
“What?!”
“Human meat ... the flesh from human body?”
“You don’t think that I am a cannibal do you?”
“Well, I don’t”, I said, “But just as it puts you off even to think about it, animal flesh is something which cannot find passage through my throat.”
“Oh, Mr. Raman, you are too complicated”, Amal said.
“Amal, I am not complicated. Don’t be afraid to face logic. You don’t have to believe in what I say or agree with my point of view. Just try to understand that a person’s food is personal, just like your thoughts and feelings. Anyway, thanks for offering the sandwich. Someday I hope that you will offer cakes, cookies or chocolates which I relish. I will readily accept them.”
A few days after that encounter Amal brought me a plateful of cookies, homemade and delicious. I asked her what was the occasion and without waiting for her answer I said “Happy birthday to you!”.
She said it was not her birthday. She had mentioned to her mother about a peculiar Indian who doesn’t eat animals and is surviving only on cabbages and carrots. Her mother was not surprised. She had heard of such creatures and even met some. She developed a soft corner for me and sent some cookies to keep me alive.
STONES HIT HARD Tamil poet Bharathi [ மகா கவி பாரதியார் ] wrote so many fantastic verses many of which appealed to me during my school days when we had them as part of our text for poetry. One of the verses hit me hard on my head and I recite it everyday as part of my prayer to keep my identity in focus. The verse in Tamil goes like this: ''ஆங்கொரு கல்லை வாசலிற் படியென்று அமைத்தனன் சிற்பி மற்றொன்றை ஓங்கிய பெருமைக் கடவுளின் வடிவென்று உயர்த்தினன், உலகினோர் தாய் நீ யான்கனே எவரை எங்கனம் சமைத்தற்கு எண்ணமோ அங்கனம் சமைப்பாய் ஈன்குனைச் சரணென் றெய்தினேன் என்னை இரும்பூதுடையனாக் குவையே '' Here is a loose translation as it occured to me : The sculptor of a temple got together thousands of black granite stones to build a fantastic and beautiful temple. The temple was already in his vision, complete to the last detail. All he had to do was to pick up the stones, work on them and put them in proper place. Of the thousands of stones that got transformed at his skilled hands one of them became the first step at the entrance to the temple. Another stone which was lying next to it became the idol of the deity worshipped by one and all. Just as the sculptor chose one stone to be elevated as the idol and another to serve as the step to climb on and enter into the temple, so too each one of us is chosen by Shakthi, the cosmic mother of all creation, to perform a specific part in the fantastic cosmic drama of the universe. All the time this verse gives me a focus, and reminds me to be the best of what I am. Whenever I try to be something else this powerful verse brings me back to my senses. I realise the futility of such attempts to be what I am not. The moment I accept myself as what I am and accept others as what they are I no longer experience any resistance or conflict. I am able to enjoy what comes to me as an occurrence in time, without any compulsion to change it. This doesn’t mean that I become inactive, hopeless or a victim of fate. The moment I don’t resist things, the need to make them any different vanishes. I feel free to be. Just be. And enjoy whatever I am capable of doing to the best of my capacity, possibility and circumstance. The resources and circumstances are no longer a limitation since the need to be something different is no longer there. It is replaced by the awareness that ‘to be’ and to enjoy being whatever I am is vast enough to experience the abundance, and to become one with that abundance which I had not been aware of for so long. Everything that takes place in my life acquires a supreme status of a cosmic occurrence. Whatever has occurred so far has gone into my past. It has no place in my future or even in my present. The occurrence of this moment gives a sense of presence to me which has not been so anytime before. I now feel the presence as it occurs. I feel no need to resist or restrict or limit this glorious moment by any need to make it fit into “it shouldn’t be so” or “it should be so” etc. It doesn’t mean anything if it occurs the way it does. It doesn’t mean anything if it doesn’t occur the way it doesn’t. I see the beauty of this design where my concepts no longer restrict or limit my being. I feel and experience the freedom to be unbound and unlimited by my concepts, my interpretations and to live my presence with the abundance of unlimited possibilities and choices. The 5 Kg stone has more mobility than the 5 ton stone. Why should the 5 ton stone feel so great because of its size and weight when it is actually more grounded and immobile for the very same reason. Why should the 5 Kg stone feel small in front of the 5 ton stone when it is so free from the burden of carrying the extra weight and size. The size doesn’t mean anything. The weight doesn’t mean anything. Position doesn’t mean anything. Power doesn’t mean anything. Fame doesn’t mean anything. Beauty doesn’t mean anything. Ugliness doesn’t mean anything. Fatness doesn’t mean anything. Leanness doesn’t mean anything. Intelligence doesn’t mean anything. Stupidity doesn’t mean anything. Being Rich doesn’t mean anything. Being Poor doesn’t mean anything. Friendliness doesn’t mean anything. Unfriendliness doesn’t mean anything.
We give meaning to meaningless things through our own interpretations. They don’t have any meaning other than being just occurrences. They occur as they occur at different points in time in the life of different persons. The freedom that comes from knowing that there is no meaning to occurrences other than what I give to them liberates me beyond belief. I am no longer bound by typical meanings arising from my past conditionings. They still arise at every occurrence but they don’t have the power to restrict my choices, my responses, my freedom to just be present to the occurrences. Every moment now opens up new possibilities. The abundance is unbelievable. Even to try to share it in so many words seems to be restrictive in some way.
At the entrance to our residence are an assortment of pots in various sizes and shapes.Some old and some just new.They house an amazing variety of plants.We see them each morning before we leave for work.We look for tiny new flowers or buds that have sprung up in the quiet of the night when we were asleep, oblivious to what was going on around us and deeply involved in our own dream world.
We invariably find something new that shows up only in the delightful hour of daybreak.
The hibiscus opens up a scarlet red bloom with a tiny set of fingers at the heart, holding soft yellow balls of pollen.The subtle smell is at once captivating and elusive.
Then there is the nasturtium, which is equally exquisite in its display of cuplike flowers in yellow orange glory, almost trying to imitate the vast canvas of colours that the sunrise has created as a sort of wake up call.When I look closer I spot the whisker -like stem which balances the flower so beautifully, like the clown in the circus walking the tight rope.The disk shaped dark green leaves that surround this delicate flower seem to be giving a standing ovation.
There are other flowers too, in the small garden that provides the background.
The honeysuckles are already hosting a breakfast party to the honeybees.The morning glory seems to be still in half a mind to open its purple blue flowers, hoping that the bees will go away and let it enjoy the warmth of the morning sun, without their noisy interruption.
I enjoy these subtle games played by the flowers while I sip my first cup of coffee for the day.It is only a short time, a few minutes before I get busy with the morning rituals.But that short time sets the pace for the day.I wouldn’t like to miss it except under unavoidable circumstances such as heavy rain or storm.
How blessed I am to be so fortunate to enjoy such brilliant displays of nature. The laughing flowers always fascinate me.
When I observe children talking to each other I gain a lot of wisdom into some areas of life and the living, by simply shifting my focus.
The other day I overheard two youngsters talking about their background.
Kid1: My dad is the chief of Police
Kid2: So what? My dad is a Judge.
Kid1: In our house we have many mango trees.
Kid2: So what? We have many banana trees.
Kid1: We have 5 dogs and they bark all the time.
Kid2: So what? We have 7 cows and they give milk all the time.
Kid1: Our car is bigger than your car.
Kid2: So what? My mom is bigger than your mom.
At that shocking revelation of reality the first kid lost his ground and couldn’t come up with any other point. The main reason was that the big mom was coming towards them and there was no way to deny the fact of the matter.
I knew that lady very well since she had visited the school many times to discuss about her kid’s progress in class in the past.
In the days that followed I was amazed to see what a single word could do to transform people when it hits them at the right point at the right time.
Apparently she had heard what her child had said to his friend although she didn’t react to it on that day.
She had probably never thought about the way her son perceived her dimensions and how he related to it.
She didn’t like to be perceived as a bigger mom and so she enrolled herself for massive doses of workout at our school gym and her determination was so strong that within 3 months she was a very different looking person.
Perhaps if her son happens to get engaged in a similar discussion with a friend this time he may well be saying “so what? My mom is prettier than your mom”.
“At least there is some good news for you - Do you know that coffee is good for your health?”
“Who told you?”
“Never mind who told me. Why do you always have to ask ‘Who told you?’ whenever I tell you something which you didn’t know? ”
“Who told you that I didn’t know? ”
“Oh God! Not again”
“OK, sorry. But I do know that coffee is good for my health”.
Now I was flat.
I couldn’t proceed further in the direction in which I originally intended to.
Here I was, with a very useful and exciting piece of information, published after years of research, but had to stop short of proclaiming the truth to the gullible audience.
So I tried another approach. I had to, since I felt that such valuable facts should not die without circulation.
“OK then. If you know it already let me hear your side of it”.
“I have already told you my side. I just know that coffee is good for my health”.
“I want to know on what basis?”
“You mean the scientific basis?”
“Of course. What else!”
It was my suspicion that he had some other basis or no basis at all. It was not possible for him to have come into contact with the research findings which I had access to, thanks to a professor friend of mine who had worked on it and just published it to a very selected group of enthusiasts (such as myself) who had encouraged him all along during the research.
His reply was simple enough.
“Whatever proof you want is right in front of you. Look at me. I am healthy. I have been drinking coffee all my life 3 to 4 cups a day. Some days even more, if I happened to visit relatives or friends at the right time.”
What a scientific basis indeed. The proof of the pudding is in the eating!
I didn’t want to discourage my friend by saying that there were a lot of people who were not so healthy and were regular coffee drinkers.
The latest information that is in my possession regarding the usefulness of coffee had to be shelved. It was of no use to my friend who already knew it beyond question. No further convincing was necessary. So now I am looking for some other coffee addicts who drink this black stuff with guilt — that it is something harmful and so they shouldn’t be drinking it, but keep drinking it anyway — if you are one of those please contact me immediately. It will be my pleasure to share with you this exciting piece of information which will alleviate your fears once and for all (until the next research report, that is).
In the mean while here the recipe for making good coffee:
Way to heaven through good coffee
- using an 'espresso' home machine + coffee grinder (not the drip type machine but the espresso -pressure extraction type which is far superior)
[This is advice given to a close friend as he asked for it -and I thought it may be useful even to my pals at large, so I am posting it on the web - don't be shy to bombard me with your comments. I am married for 35 yrs and can field it without burning my head]
[1] Get equal quantities of Arabica and Peaberry coffee seeds roasted to dark brown but not black (if it is oozing oil know that it is already over-roasted and not the best even though it will smell very nice. If the shop keeper is not willing to give you roasted seeds but will only give powder - (as most of the guys do, fearing that we will take away their business or perhaps worried that we will find out that they are mixing chicory without our permission) - don't give up, keep trying and you will find some guy who will pity you and oblige. If you still don't find one I can recommend some in Chennai who will be glad to supply you as they do for me, for the past 6 years.
Actually chicory is not bad but it is generally added to make the coffee strong. But coffee tastes better without chicory.
Once you get the roasted seeds, keep them in airtight glass containers so the flavour will last at least two weeks. You can keep them mixed or separate as you prefer. I keep them separate so I can mix different ratios as per my taste.
Equal quantities may be ok to start with. Later you may find that 2 parts Peaberry and one part Arabica will be tastier. This is very subjective and so l leave it at that.
Now comes the actual process. First grind the coffee in the electric coffee grinder to get about 3 or 4 heaped teaspoons per cup of coffee. If you are making for your wife also - [better do - otherwise you will be left with no food for the day] - you will need about 6 or 7 teaspoons of freshly ground powder. Fill it in the extractor-cup provided. Press it with a cylindrical wooden or plastic or stainless steel compactor piece that comes with the machine. That will ensure strong extract [not watery].
Pour a glass of water into the Espresso machine reservoir. Fit the coffee powder magazine into the slot and switch on after placing the glass or cup to collect the decoction which comes through within a couple of minutes. Watch out to switch it off in time (if it is not automatic) as it will pour down more than you need and make it messy and diluted. Best coffee is always made with the first extract.
While the brewing is in progress you can heat a small quantity of milk in a cup by steaming it at the spout provided, until it is very hot and foamy. This is the milk which is to be added to the decoction after you pour it into two cups and add sugar to taste. It is better to keep the sugar low at just one spoon so that the coffee taste comes through.
Also the trick of making the best tasting coffee lies in keeping the quantity of milk to just enough. Too much milk makes it suitable only for babies and too less makes it taste like the inside of a burnt bitter-gourd. (Don't add cold or fresh milk to coffee - that is an insult to coffee. The only exception may be when you make cold coffee which I don't and so I can't advice you on that)
Serve it hot and make sure you drink it slowly sip by sip looking at the nice trees or flowers that appear through the window.
Don't drink coffee reading the newspaper or watching the idiot box. That is the greatest insult to good coffee. It is heavenly if you taste it with full attention without thinking about what will happen at work or whether the share market will nose dive at this all-time -high level.
Life is too short, so enjoy your coffee to make it at least worth living to that extent. And make coffee for your wife even if she refuses to drink it initially for fear that it may make her sick. Slowly she will enjoy it, feel a lot of love for you and stop finding you a pest.
Note: There will always be some extra decoction coming through after the first extract. Don't keep it - throw it away , it will not be as tasty and it will spoil your name if you give it to anybody , particularly friends like me - if and when we come to visit you and stay a little longer than you expect.
After trying it for a few days let me know whatever happens and I will do my best to save you.
I have a friend in Libya, who is always jovial and makes things light for all people around. His name is Salah Assker. He is an Instrument Technician by profession and uncomfortably fat by appearance, though not by preference.
He has a very nice way of putting off things which he doesn’t want to do.
In some uneasy situations when someone is trying to force him to say ‘Yes’ he will respond “Look, my friend, I usually consult my father before I decide on such important issues. So I can’t say yes, just now. Please give me time”. With that he will escape.
If the guy asks him again after a few days he will reply, “Oh! Not yet. I have to talk to my dad”.
Once we were in the midst of a discussion about the way people sometimes take advantage of good friends even to the point of unintentionally risking a souring in the relationship. One of his friends came in, said ‘Hi’[ ‘kif halak’ in Arabic ] and asked him whether he would be kind enough to allow him to use his car for a couple of hours.
I could see from Salah’s face that he was not inclined to give the car. But with amazing ease he excused himself saying “Oh! You know I really can’t allow it without my father’s approval. So you have to excuse me. If you want me to drop you somewhere urgently, please tell me. I will”. The friend wasn’t offended. He went away mumbling that he will try with someone else.
I complimented Salah for the nice and tactful way he said no. I added that not many people had such reverence and respect for their father and asked him where his father was working. He said his father was not working anymore.
I generally do not like to ask questions of personal nature even with close friends. I believe that everyone is entitled to the privacy of his own self. There are some personal matters which we don’t like to discuss with others.
So I was almost violating my own self-proclaimed code of conduct when I asked the next question without thinking of the consequences. Sometimes we are off guard in moments of empathy and I was no exception.
“Is he retired?” I asked.
He said “He retired long back. He lived well. He is now underground”.
I asked him “Excuse me! What do you mean, underground?”
He said “Oh? You know, he is no more. He died when I was very young”.
I was speechless.
I didn’t know how to proceed and he saw my hesitation.
He said “You are wondering how I could consult my dad. Well he is always with me in my memory. I put the matter which needs his attention in that part of my mind and leave it there. I will get a guidance soon enough.”
I asked “How will you know when it comes?”
“That comes with practice. And I am well versed with it from my early childhood.”
I still think that it is a very clever way to manage a situation from going out of hand and to keep friendships in tact in spite of uncomfortable situations such as these.
May god give us all such guidance at times when we face a tight corner.
