Bed of Nails

JERRY TAKES A DIG:

Jerry used to jog with me when we were in a workout program 3 evenings a week. I introduced some breathing techniques from Yoga to the group to help them expand their lungs and increase their oxygen intake.

The next day when he met me at work he was appreciative of the techniques. He said he had read about Yoga but did not have any idea that breathing techniques were part of Yoga.

He then asked me "I read that Yogis always sleep on a bed of nails. Do you sleep on nails too?"

I was not shocked by his question because many people in the west have only a vague idea about Yoga because of what they read and the magazines highlight only odd bits such as sleeping on the nails.

If I have to undertake the formidable task of changing such public opinion one life time would not be enough and even then I might end up wasting my time because people only believe what they want to believe.

To them ‘India = Snake Charmers + Elephants’ and ‘Yoga = Standing upside down, sleeping on a bed of nails.’

But Jerry needed an answer, much as he would have liked to believe that I might one day teach him to sleep on a nail bed. I had to politely and firmly dispel such misconceptions for the good of both of us.

I said "One day not long ago when I went to bed there was something that disturbed my sleep and yet I didn’t know exactly what was wrong. I turned this way and that way, adjusted the pillow. Then everything seemed OK, but after sleeping for a few minutes I woke up again. There was something biting me at my back. I switched the light on and without disturbing my wife I tried to see what it was. There seemed to be something below the sheets. I moved the sheets. There indeed was the culprit- a hairpin. After I removed it I had no problem with my sleep.

So tell me if a small hairpin can be so uncomfortable to sleep on, how can I ever sleep on a bed of nails?

There may indeed be some yogis who have achieved complete control and detachment from feelings and for them it is immaterial whether they sleep on a mattress or a nail bed. The rest of us have to be happy with normal beds since nail beds are expensive.

One more important point should be taken into consideration before you entertain such temptations. The gaps between the nails will invariably provide free accommodation to bed bugs to whom biting humans is an endless source of pleasure and protein”.

He started laughing, amused that bug bites could make any difference to a person who is unaffected by nail pricks.